I'll take my losses
This period of my life has been some of my happiest. There is something about having time that grants you a feeling of freedom and contentment that other things cannot (e.g. 9-5 employment).
I love being guided by my curiosity, but half the time, if not more, it doesn’t go my way. For some reason, I’ve become incredibly good at taking rejection. Following my curiosity means applying for things I find interesting, and deciding that I want to do something right now in this moment. Sometimes it also means I do things I’m not prepared for. I don’t mean mentally, because spontaneity and mental preparedness have a pretty strong correlation, but as in I do not have enough knowledge or experience to actually do the thing but I’m going to do it anyway (in a non-life threatening way). I went for a motorcycle basic test and got asked to leave midway because I didn’t know enough of the highway code (fair). I went to my first acting callback and didn’t expect half the things they asked me to do, also I was very nervous. I’ve applied for loads of jobs and other opportunities and have been rejected or have had no response for all of them.
In my last 6 months of unemployment I have been rejected from literally everything I have tried for lol!!! Years ago while job searching, I was in the place where the constant rejections felt like an attack on my self worth and it felt like shit. I no longer let my losses affect me this way. Unfortunately I have no step by step guide on how to make the jump from rejection=sad to rejection=ok! we move. And maybe, at some point, I’ll have been rejected so much that I return to the rejection=sad place. For now, to me, rejection just means that something wasn’t meant for me. Yes, I might have spent hours on an application, loads of effort preparing for something, so when the result isn’t what I wanted, it’s still going to be a bit of a blow. When the blow hits harder than usual, I remember the truest cliche of all time - it’s about the journey, not the destination.
You mean… in the process of trying, I learned something new? You mean… in trying something new, I failed but it was still fun? You mean… in putting yourself in the unknown, whatever outcome is still a win for you?
One of the greatest joys in life is that we get to experience things! All the things! The good stuff, the fun stuff, the sad stuff, the angry stuff. How amazing.